Out Loud
Boundaries, people-pleasing, and the quiet patterns underneath them. Written for the person who already knows something needs to change.
Assertiveness work is not training anyone to be blunt. This post covers what the phrase actually means, where CBT fits, what sessions usually address, and what this kind of work will not promise.
Saying no is a skill, not a personality trait. Here are nine plain scripts and what to do when the guilt follows you anyway.
Working on people-pleasing with a registered psychologist in Edmonton, from the first conversation onward, and what the work does not involve.
The reflex apology fires faster than the thought behind it. If you have ever wondered why you say sorry so often, this post explains the mechanism behind the habit and what it actually takes to interrupt it.
Most boundary advice assumes the other person eventually cooperates. This one covers the version where they do not, and where a hard conversation ends and an unsafe one begins.
People-pleasing rarely looks like a problem from the outside. Ten signs the habit is running the show, and what it tends to cost at work and at home.
Most of the advice about EMDR explains the therapy. Very little of it helps you choose the person. Here is how to check training, what to ask on a first call, and when to walk away.
Eye movements sound like a party trick. Here is what EMDR actually involves, phase by phase, why it is not hypnosis, and why you never have to narrate the worst thing that happened to you.
You have heard the acronym. Here is what actually happens in the room, what homework really means, and where it fits if you keep saying yes when you meant no.
People-pleasing is not politeness. It is a habit of putting yourself last, and it can be unlearned. Here is where I would start.
If something here sounds like your life, the next step is a fifteen minute call. You tell me what is going on, and I will tell you honestly whether I can help.
Reading is not therapy, and nothing here is advice about your situation. If you are in distress right now, call 780-482-4357, or 911 if you are in danger. You can also call or text 988 any time. More crisis resources →
